Friends with benefits isn’t just that funny romcom where Mila Kunis makes eyes at Justin Timberlake, it is something that seems to be gaining ground all around us. The rise in this phenomenon means it obviously satisfies the needs of the general populace; however is all hunky and dory with such an arrangement? Read on to know some of the reasons why friends with benefits isn’t such a hot idea.
1. Emotions can get in the way
The big idea behind the friends with benefits concept is that it keeps the messy emotions of a relationship out of the picture. However, if you think that you could be physically intimate on a regular basis with a friend and not feel a thing for him you are simply denying the fact that you are a human being. It may come as news to you, but we human beings are a seething cauldron of emotions. We get attached to street dogs if we see them long enough; this is an actual person you are sharing your bed with. So yes, it is going to get complex sooner or later. One of you is going to start to see more into the relationship then there really is and then all hell will break loose.
2. You do not get the relationship positives
Believe it or not, being in a relationship has certain things going for it. You get stability for one. You know that when things go awry, you have someone to go home to and share your problems with. On a more simplistic level, you have someone you can sign up for salsa class with, buy a dog with – things which make you feel warm and mushy on the inside. It is a great feeling to be with someone, to relax in someone’s company. Friends with benefits is the exact opposite of all that, so if you are the type who believes that Harry actually met Sally and they lived happily ever after, then this one is not for you.
3. A social disadvantage
There can be awkwardness in defining your relationship to other people. Even if you have a zippy zappy swift life, you will have a social circle you sometimes like to hang out with. You may have common friends and it might get a little difficult to introduce your beneficial friend as just that. Till the time friends with benefits gets an acronym on the lines of say BFF (standing for best friends forever!) it will be a tad difficult to talk about your relationship with your friends.
4. It can come in the way of finding love
Having a friend with benefits can get in the way of finding real love in life. This is of course a hurdle for those who believe they would like to be in a loving, caring relationship someday. Being somewhat attached to someone even if only in a physical sort of a way can make it difficult for you to get interested in someone new. Besides, what would you be telling the guy on your first date? That though I sleep ever so often with this friend of mine, I would really like to take our relationship forward. Besides, you will have conflicting emotions playing in your head all the time, making it difficult if not impossible to get into a real relationship.
5. He might find someone else
Since the whole arrangement isn’t binding on anyone and the ties of commitment are limited to convenience only, it is possible that you may be left alone without any warning. Guys can keep physical intimacy distinct from their emotions better than women and hence may find someone else attractive or even develop feelings for them despite being physically involved with someone else. So your guy may ditch you without a warning, without so much as a thank you for the laughs. Even if it was an arrangement bereft of all emotions, you will have definitely developed a habit of seeing one another. Suddenly letting go of all it can be heart wrenching.
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